Oh joy, oh rapture, Nutella be thine name

+ =

Oh my goodness! Literally goodness and all things good, and holy, and fattening, and wonderful.

I remember when I was in London, I had my first proper European chocolate croissant. It was in the basement of Harrods in their amazing market place/food court. I really do not see many chocolate croissants here in the Chicago area. However, I have discovered Nutella and now all I have to do is get some lovely, buttery croissants, and *VOILA* I am back at Harrods in a state of British carbohydrate nirvana!

Thanks Europe for sending us Nutella, and thanks Kobe Bryant and Giada di Laurentiis for bringing it to my attention.

Have a yummy day!

(oh and sorry the + and the = are off kilter, but the format will not let me put them where they properly go)

Childhood Beauty Icons

I have always been obsessed with beauty, and all things beautiful. When I was a child I loved to watch my beauty icons on television and movies. I have always been a "girl's girl" and I have always admired women with grace, taste, and lovliness.

I had many childhood beauty icons as a young girl, and needless to say my taste in beauty has changed since then, but many of my childhood beauty icons have stayed the same. The classic beauties have always amazed me: Natalie Wood, Grace Kelly, Sophia Loren, Audrey Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor, Ursula Andress, Jacqueline Kennedy, Catherine Deneuve, etc. This post, however is dedicated to the campy, and sometimes tacky women who were actually hot and happening and all over TV and movies when I was growing up in the 70's and 80's. Women who I wanted to be when I grew up. Beautiful women.

As I said, I was a child of the 70's and 80's so, it goes without saying that I loved Charlie's Angels. Seriously--the feathered flaxen blonde and brunette hair was intoxicating to a wild haired, freckle faced redheaded little girl from Oklahoma like me. My hair never would feather like that. Viva la Farrah, Kate, and Jacqueline. To see Farrah in an interview now just makes me sad, but Jacqueline is still gorgeous to this day.



Holly Holstrom from the Price is Right. OK--Quit laughing you smug people! There were very, very few beautiful redheads on TV when I was a child. Holly was beautiful and she was a redhead, and to little girls everywhere, her job was oh so glamorous! Showcase Showdown anyone?



Lauren Hutton. She was such a hot model when I was a small child. I stayed with my very posh aunt a lot of the time when I was a kid, and she always had the BEST fashion magazines from all over the world. I would devour the pages of French Vogue, Marie Claire, Elle etc. I always thought Lauren looked so natural and so sporty. And the gap in her smile.....Lauren made that gap work! Pox on veneers--Lauren Hutton rocked the imperfect smile!



Carol Alt was another beautiful model from my childhood days. I remember Carol as being the hottest model on the planet next to Christy Brinkley when I was little. I always found Carol's beauty to be much more interesting that Christy's--until Christy married Billy Joel, then Christy was OK by me.



Angie Dickinson. I was very small when Angie was hot, but come on--she was tough as nails, and I loved her hairstyle. She was Police Woman and I wanted some of her piss and vinegar. Angie was a tough broad and I liked her!





Victoria Principal was another lovely redhead on TV when I was young. I used to think Dallas was such a great show when I was a child. Southfork was so glamorous, and they were so wealthy! I wanted to live at Southfork and have a husband just like Bobby Ewing (Patrick Duffy--HA), and be Pamela Ewing. I used to really dream big. Oh Lord!




Patti Hansen was also one of my favorite models when I was a child. She was sometimes honey blonde, but sometimes she was a strawberry blonde-and she always had freckles. I thought she was IT! I could not understand why on earth she married Keith Richards....but I understand it now. Last year, I was lucky enough to get to sit by her at Buff Spa at Bergdorf Goodman in NYC. We were both getting a manicure and we were chatting about Deborah Lippman nail polish. She was loving the color Satin Doll and I told her that Mariah Carey inspired that color. Patti was beautiful, and friendly, and very normal.






Marie Osmond....OK, SHUT UP, I KNOW! But seriously, what little girl from the 70's at least for a fleeting second did not want to be Marie Osmond? Till you admitted the crush on Donny and found out that is just crazy and wrong? I loved Marie. She was wholesome....not to mention she was country and rock and roll dammit! I used to sport a Donny and Marie T-shirt and I was all proud. By the way--Donny is still hot! Mormons age really well. Must be the clean living.

Honorable mention goes to Stephanie Powers from Hart to Hart, Heather Thomas from TJ Hooker, and Joyce Dewitt from Three's Company--shut up, I liked her! She was smart and practical, and THAT IS HOT!

Who were some of your childhood beauty icons? And to my male readers, who did you want to be when you grew up? I already know that Lost Okie loved (and still loves) Clint Eastwood.

Have a beautiful day!

My trip to Oklahoma in pictures: Part Two

The hand is my Grandma's after I gave her a manicure. She was born in 1914 and has worked very hard her whole life. She has sewn, picked cotton, cooked, and gardened ( and played many a game of bingo) with those hands, and for 92 years old, I think her hands are beautiful. Those are her real nails, and she loves to get a manicure.

My Trip to Oklahoma in Pictures Part One

I went to Oklahoma for my Grandma's 92nd birthday party. The top picture is of my lovely Grandma in the shirt I bought her for her party! I love my Grandma. The James Garner picture is for Melanie. It was hanging in a montage of famous Oklahomans at the airport.

Make Up School--by Jemma Kidd

New Makeup came to my doorstep today from Bergdorf Goodman! I have been an admirer of Jemma and Jodie Kidd for a while now. I have followed them through their modeling careers in Europe, and now I am thrilled that Jemma has her own cosmetic line.
The colors and packaging are both gorgeous. I cannot wait to order more.

I also got a book a few days ago:
I cannot wait to pour a glass of German Riesling and peruse the pages of Chanel! The cover art is by Karl Lagerfeld.

I am sorry the glare is so bad in all these pictures. You can get a better look at Jemma's makeup line at www.BergdorfGoodman.com .

Take Home Chef

SIGN ME UP!











photo from TLC.com

Reader Request

(edited) -Grrr I wanted to add a really cool graphic here, and I will keep trying--however Blogger is not letting me add any images today. DAMMIT!


Today I wil be answering a request from a reader. Most of you who read this blog are probably familiar with this reader. His posts are witty and biting and crass and funny and flirty (especially with Melanie and a mystery woman with cute sandals and pink toenails). Annie especially loved the post about the bars he has visited and barmaids he has had his way with.

"C" aka Lost Okie, from California asked me to blog about actors and actresses who are horrible at accents. "C" had quite a few ideas of his own, he also had a few ideas of actors or actresses who have good accents. I believe he mentioned Madonna--what?

I have very few talents. BUT I rock at doing accents. Where does that get me? No the hell where, but it is fun, and I am a hit at improv becasue of my accent talent. So it is with confidence that I list some actors with horrible accents. " C" do you have a pen and paper?

AHEM..... Bad Accents:

1. The whole cast of Brokeback Mountain *EXCEPT Randy Quaid*.
Anne Hathaway, Heath Ledger, Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle Williams--their Southern accents sucked-- ALL OF THEM. Michelle had a stellar performance but her accent was blah. Poor Anne Hathaway just sounded like nails on a chalkboard to me, plus she showed her tooters--even more offensive than her faux accent! Heath Ledger--bad accent, plus a speech impediment. Ang Lee must have never heard an authentic Southern Accent before--EVER.

2. Jennifer Aniston and Jake Gyllenhaal (yet again) for their sorry Southern Accents in The Good Girl. John C Reily had a quite good Southern accent. He impressed me with the whole Teeny Tiny Tini bit.

3. Daryl Hannah in Steel Magnolias. Her Southern accent was so exaggerated and fake, which is a shame because Dolly and Sally and Julia brought such real Southern charm to the table.

4. Renee Zellweger in Bridget Jones Diary. I know, I know, she actually had a good British accent, but I KNOW she is a Texan, so I was distracted the whole time.

5. Matt Damon and Ben Affleck in Good Will Hunting. The weird thing is they are both actually from Boston, but their abrasive South Boston accents just sounded weird and like they were trying too hard.

6. Naomi Watts in The Ring. Her American accent is just so unconvincing. UGH In the same boat as Naomi is her good friend Nicole Kidman.

7. Larry The Cable Guy-- He goes in and out of his accent, I cannot hold it against him though because he is supposed to be silly and funny.....Not a serious actor

8. Laurence Fishburne in Pee Wee's Playhouse--His Southern Accent was atrocious! But oh how I loved that show!

I am sure there are many many many more, and please feel free to tell me some. I am sure "C" would love to hear your opinions.

On the other hand, I think Meryl Streep is great at all accents. I loved her accent in Bridges Of Madison County!
I also think many of the actors on The Sopranos who are not from Jersey sound pretty dang good.

I think Taye Diggs had a great Jamaican accent in How Stella Got Her Groove Back. Hubba McHubba!

Oh- and Robin Williams is VERY good at accents too.

Folks that make a Monkey smile...Ricky Gervais

BRILLIANT. Ricky Gervais is brilliant! I first saw him in the original BBC version of THE OFFICE. He was hilarious beyond belief. He played the quirky David Brent who was the regional manager of the paper company. The format was the same as the American version with the cameras always following. I miss the original version, but I do enjoy the American version with Steve Carrell in the regional manager role.
Steve is hilarious too.


Ricky also did a show in HBO last season called Extras. It was funny enough, but did not have the character development or the supporting players that made The Office so fabulous.




(photos from BBC.CO.UK and nbc.com)

Bonnie and Richie

I came across an old photo of Faye Dunaway from Bonnie and Clyde and I was struck at how much Nicole Richie resembles La Dunaway in that bygone era kind of way. I am not a fan of Nicole, but I am rather astonished at her metamorphosis from chubby, homely, white trash looking first season of The Simple Life Nicole, to the fashion fabulous little waif Nicole she has become. Sorry, but it is true.

I admire her complete change in style, and I think her stylists are fabulous, and so does Jimmy Choo obviously. I do, however wish the girl would just eat a hamburger.

Am I crazy, or does Nicole look like Faye in Bonnie and Clyde?

Have a lovely day!

(photos from moviemarket.com and nicolerichie.nu)

Beautiful Things

Bond Scent of Peace Candle. I cannot wait until this is available for purchase. I think it is beautiful, and the scent is lovely. You will be able to find this candle at www.Saks.com when it does indeed become available for purchase.
Pink Manhattan Purrrrfume by the beautiful and talented Sali Oguri. I have the honor to know Sali in a round about way. She is a singer, musician, songwriter, and perfumer. Pink Manhattan is sexy, sultry and oh so girly. It is a scent that evokes fun times in New York City and it screams summer. You can get a bottle (or a sample) of Pink Manhattan at www.luckyscent.com .

Gorgeous Valentino handbag. So classic. So sleek. I want this bag for fall.




Strange Invisible Perfumes. These scents are so haunting, enchanting and very unique. The Perfumer, Alexandra Balahoutis has lived and traveled all over the world and her fragrances reflect her travels so beautifully! Some of her scents include:

Arunima--meaning Glow Of Dawn in Sanskirt, contains notes of Blue Lotus, Madagascan Vanilla, Frankincense, Lavender from Kashmir, Ginger, Cardamom, and Key Lime.

Tosca- contains notes of Mimosa, Jasmine, Tobacco Leaf, Pale Musk, Italian Bergamot, and Sicilian Orange Blossom.

Trapeze-- comes alive with notes of Tuberose, Carnation, Vetiver and Spearmint.

To me, these all sound DELICIOUS! There are many more unique scents on the website.
You can find out more about these incredible scents at www.siperfumes.com .
Their boutique is located in Venice Beach, CA, and their phone number is available on their website. Tell them MonkeyPosh sent you!

Have a beautiful night!

A plea for advice, help or information

Hello All,

May I apologize in advance for the somber tone of the post. I try to keep my blog silly and upbeat, but not today. Today I am angry and I am asking you for help.

I live on a pond, along with 2 other houses. The pond is home to many fish, beavers, turtles, frogs and is a popular watering hole to deer, raccons, opossums, and the occasional coyote.

One of my neighbors has decided to hook a pump up to the pond and use it to water his yard like a damn golf course. Our neighborhood utilizes well water becasue we are considered "county" as opposed to "city". In the summer when the water tables get low it is almost impossible to wash clothes, run the dishwasher and take a shower all at the same time because there is just not enough water pressure. Forget about a sprinkler system. It works well for about 10 minutes then the pressure is just too weak to keep it going. It is unfortunate that we live on a well, but we do.

Last year my asshole neighbor did the same thing (draining the pond to water his yard) and by August my end of the pond ( I live on the end and asshole lives in the middle) got so low that it was littered with dead fish. It was very sad, not to mention dead fish in the August heat do not smell very nice. The ends of a pond are much shallower than the middle---so my part was the part going dry.

I tried to talk to my neighbor about this and at first he lied and said he did not run his sprinkler system hooked up via the pond very much---I responded in kind and informed him that I had witnessed it run for HOURS A DAY all summer to which he got very defensive speaking very hateful to me and he told me that it does not take very much water from the pond...and that most of it runs back into the pond. I got angry and informed him that the great quantities of water runs into the street and NOT BACK INTO THE POND......So not only is he an asshole, he is an idiot. I thought that since I let him know that I knew exactly what he was doing, and he knew it was wrong (hence the primary lies about it) that this year he would not drain the pond becasue he wants his yard to look like a golf course--however it is only June and already he is draining the pond for the vanity of his yard. Might I add...he has no special flowers or trees, he simply wants his yard to look like a golf course--while every other house on the block respects the water tables and by July has dry, crispy grass.

My question to you all is this: What would be my best course of action that is effective as well as conducive to a positive outcome? I will start by writing a letter to the Housing Board in my neighborhood, and I have contacted the Environmental Protection Agency--but they are bombarded with mosquito epidemics and much bigger problems than mine. The pond is owned by the 3 households that live on it, and not by the neighborhood or the county, so it may just be my problem. The asshole neighbor is an attorney, so I do not want to just get my own attorney and have a pissin' contest (as they say in the South) with him because I am sure he knows all the tricks and scare tactics, which could just end up being very expensive for me in attorney's fees.
I want my actions to be effective and honorable without making him too mad becasue it is quite obvious he has no respect for animals and wildlife, and I would not put it past him to be evil and petty and do something to my dogs. Seriously. He is an asshole.

He does not have the RIGHT to drain my pond, and kill all the fish in the process. I am so appauled at his audacity.

Thank you very much for any and all information, advice or help.

Please excuse any errors in spelling and grammar, but I am pissed and short on time.

Kara Janx Wrap Dress

I love this dress. It looks so comfortable. It is a design by Kara Janx from the last season of Project Runway. I remember when she wore it on the show, and it looked great on.

I think I may order this. It could work in warm weather with some nice wedges, and in the fall/winter with some killer high boots.

(photo from www.girlshop.com)

Sunday Night Wanderlust......

I have had a very bad case of wanderlust lately. I want to travel. I want to see and smell and taste and learn. There is no better form of education in my opinion , than traveling the world. I have been looking at photos of some of my previous travels. I will share with you some of my photos of Venice, Italy.
Buena Serata!